Clearing Limiting Beliefs to Create Life and Business Your Way: Best in Class Insights from Sophie French
In a world filled with infinite possibilities, the notion that ‘the things you dream of come true’ can be both inspiring and daunting.
In this Best in Class Insights article, Holistic Business Coach, Writer and Speaker, Sophie French, shares her guidance on how to clear limiting beliefs to create life and business the way you want it. Over to Sophie…
Spoiler Alert. The things you dream of come true. This idea, often associated with the principles of manifesting, emphasises the importance of belief, intention and proactive behaviour in turning dreams into reality. But how exactly do we bridge the gap between dreams and reality?
The answer lies in a trifecta of being clear about what we want, clearing any beliefs in the way of us getting there, and taking the action that lines us up.
Over the last years, where the closing down of the world during the pandemic meant a closing down of businesses, of relationships, of families, of dreams - it brought with it an air of futility in the collective. A giving up, a despondency, a needing to pick self back up again and go again which we are still in the place of coming out of.
The damage of this is not just what it has done to businesses but also to hearts and dreams. Sometimes, a traumatic experience that was experienced collectively through this, particularly in the UK, can be enough to shatter hopes. However, this is dangerous territory because without a compelling vision - it’s easy to get disheartened with life and be drawn into a spiral of negative thoughts and behaviours. A despondency, futility and a ‘what’s the point’ can cloud over us.
During this period of recovery - economically, emotionally, collectively - a compelling vision for the future is the piece that will always keep us moving forward and keep us not just surviving, but thriving.
Tony Robbins says that desire and seeing that we’re progressing is what keeps us moving forward in our lives. It drives us as animals and individuals and keeps us growing - one of our core basic emotional needs.
Without a compelling vision for ourselves and our lives, we begin to dwindle, get stuck in spirals and feel like we’re spinning in circles - never quite going in any specific direction, feeling swayed by the world around us - and as we can see by the world of politics and opinions around us - that’s not a very certain place to be!
Now is the time to unplug from the world around us and all the distractions, and to tap into what it is we truly want - to find that place inside ourselves where we can access our unique and compelling vision - and move towards it while the world and the energy we need shows up for us instead and the momentum carries us through!
So how do we do this in a world that seems to want to pull us in a million different directions?
START BY GETTING QUIET WITH YOURSELF | DEEPLY QUIET & LISTENING
Take some deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth as you feel the fog of your mind clearing, and tuning in with your body.
Allow yourself some time here because asking your heart the question - what am I most called to do in the world? What inspires me? What makes my heart sing and soar when I think about it?
Allow whatever wants to come through to come through. Perhaps you get a vision, maybe it’s a feeling, a message, maybe there is emotion there, maybe it’s really clear or maybe it takes some time to come through - trust it and allow the space for it to unfold.
Bask in the feeling of it for as long as you can, explore it, understand it, ask to be shown a little more if you feel called to.
Write down what comes up so you have it to hand and can come back to it as your reminder each day or whenever you feel to be reminded.
What are some small action steps you can take that might bring that more into your life right now - perhaps you had a vision of you painting somewhere by the sea - well, have you been painting at all? Can you put in a time to get some paints out? Is there a painting class near you could book in for?
We often keep things so far ‘out there’ in the future - when the reality is we could start doing the things now - and ironically - vibrationally - it means the things we desire are happening already. By the time you visit the sea you’ll be fully fledged in your love for painting and voila! You’re in your vision.
SPEND TIME VISUALISING THE THINGS YOU TRULY WANT
Hang out there a little while and enjoy it. Your nervous system and mind need to get used to having the things you say you want at a cellular level (so you don’t self-sabotage the sh&t out of them when they turn up!)
We get so pulled by what’s familiar - even if it feels awful! - because our systems want to ‘stay safe’. So when we visualise the things we want to be doing, by the time it happens it will be what feels familiar which means we’ll more easily be able to receive it and hold it!
You can access a visualisation I’ve created to support you with this here.
UNDERSTAND AND UNCOVER YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS - AND THE THINGS THAT TELL YOU WHY YOU ‘CAN’T’ DO THESE THINGS
Often, our subconscious mind will come up with a ton of reasons why we can’t have the things we want. It will focus on all the reasons it is ‘unsafe’ to go towards that - all the times you’ve tried in the past and it didn’t work out etc.
This is the stuff that keeps us stuck and swirling in circles when we’re not working with our subconscious mind to clear out the deep rooted subconscious reasons we sense ‘danger’! In fact, if our subconscious mind was on board with everything we wanted, we’d have it already in our reality.
EFT Tapping is a brilliant way to clear out the fears you have in your subconscious mind and get into alignment with your vision.
This is also what I specialise in within my coaching sessions - supporting you to understand what’s happening in your subconscious mind and releasing the fears and doubts that come up for you - and get you back on track with forward momentum towards your vision (once we’ve uncovered what it is!)
IT IS NOT ALWAYS ABOUT THE PHYSICAL MANIFESTATION BUT WHO YOU BECOME ALONG THE WAY
Sometimes we’re so afraid to set our visions or our goals in case they ‘don’t happen’ or we ‘fail’ - but what if we were to think differently about things. What if, the setting of your vision, the working towards it and clearing out anything in the way is the point.
Working towards something is part of your growth and progress and refining process - with every vision you have you are being asked to expand into a greater version of yourself you know yourself to be. What if, just by having the vision, you know that it must be possible and it is part of your journey to bring it to life and into reality. It is all a part of your becoming.
Think about starting and running your own business for example - you might think you just want to start a creative business so that you can have the freedom to work for yourself - but you never even imagined the self-development work you’d be invited to do, the amount of new incredible people you’ve met along your journey, the opportunities you’d had. You just knew you had the vision to start a business - the rest has been a part of your becoming!
TRUST THE VISIONS YOU HAVE
I often say that if you have a vision of something for yourself and it comes from within you - then it is for you!! If it wasn’t, you’d be visioning something else. Perhaps you have the vision of writing a book one day - that’s because it’s for you! The builder down the road might not have that vision, they might have one of building their own house - which is for them! Trust the visions you have that they are uniquely yours! If it wasn’t for you you wouldn’t be able to imagine it. Trust it and keep going.
LET OTHER PEOPLE’S VISIONS INSPIRE YOU RATHER THAN DETER YOU OR MAKE YOU COMPARE YOURSELF
If you see someone else’s dream come to fruition and you sense a pang of jealousy or frustration, this is simply coming from lack where some part of you believes that it is possible for someone else but not you. Or it is your biggest guide that actually that’s what you want. Instead, let that be a signal that it is possible for you too.
In 1956, Roger Bannister was the first person ever to run a four minute mile - before that, no-one believed it was possible. Once he’d done it however and people had evidence of it being possible, many more people went on to run a mile in four minutes. They just needed the proof and inspiration from someone else to know it could be done.
THE FINAL WORD
It’s so easy to feel distracted in this world and to be pulled and swayed by everything and everyone else around you - but take the time to tune into you, unplug from the outside world and remember what you truly desire - to feel, to do, to have in your life - and it will always guide you in the right direction for you!
If you’d like some help with getting quiet and clear, clearing out the distractions and noise in the way of you hearing your own self, and to tap into what you want, need and love in this next phase of your life, you can explore coaching together through a one-off session or series of sessions with me.
I’d love to leave you with this Spoiler Alert poem I wrote, to help you start feeling inspired again about designing your life the way you want it.
-
It all works out
You drink Aperol Spritz in the South of France
You sing for love and money
You get the orange jeep!
And you drive around Europe on your motorbike
You have a little girl
With orange curls
She arrives fast
You surprise everyone with that one
You let yourself have fun babe
You are free the way you dreamed
And you taste all the ice cream flavours
and YOU get to choose your favourite
You know him when you see him
And he’s so kind and sexy
And you still always love
Waking up with yourself
You buy your own palace
Fit for a queen
Right by the water
And your friends come to stay
And you host retreats from your space
And you romance everyone you meet
And you remind them how to treat
themselves
With all the cherishment in the world
And you write
Oh how you write
With a fizz of excitement
Bubbling in your insides
And you publish the book
And then another three
You dance in your pants
In that place next to the sea
And you have thousands of women
Who know your name
You teach them how to love themselves
How to never be controlled again
And you travel with your besties
Around the world
Sharing classes on self-love and self-worth
And the money comes in
Babe it flows when you let it
When you give up feeling guilty
For being on your shit
And you never go to prison
For not paying your tv licence
And you grow old and feel happy
Even in the silence
And on the day you die
You’re full of love
On all the things you’ve seen and done
Of all the versions of people you’ve been
As it all flashes by on your life TV screen
And your heart could burst
Cos’ you know you did good
The love pours in
Like the deepest of floods
And you’re ready to go
But you don’t want to leave them
Though you know it’s not long
Til you see them again